you lose, you win

I hate losing things. I have a horrible habit of putting something down and forgetting where I put it. People tell me to make a mental note whenever I put my keys down (or whatever else). They don’t know that the problem is making the mental note in the first place. If I could do that, then I would never lose anything again.

Sometimes you lose something and it is so immediately obvious that it’s been lost. It’s like the crash of a sudden wave against your back when you’re standing by the ocean. I used to hate that feeling… back when I was much smaller and couldn’t keep my balance. That kind of stuff usually doesn’t knock me over completely anymore but I will definitely lose my footing if I’m not paying attention. But I’m getting sidetracked… I’m talking about the intangible losses that happen in almost an instant that you can’t get back on your own. It’s an uncomfortable feeling… that lack of control. It makes you want to crawl out of your own skin. Time and distance are the only things that heal… funny… yesterday distance was my enemy… today it’s what heals. What tomorrow? Loss is a good thing? Maybe so… knowing loss makes gaining something in the future much, much sweeter…

Why do I have to see the good in so many bad things that can happen? Is it because it is further revelation of God’s grace and mercy? How He protects me from things I can’t see or understand. He gave us His truth in the Gospel and that should be sufficient… but it is not exhaustive. He knows more than me. Not like a school teacher knowing more than her student… but like the Creator of the Universe knowing more than the created. He doesn’t just know how I was made, He knows why. And that is a comforting thought… whatever I lose… He will restore.