just a thought

i was falling asleep and my mind once again starting flipping stations from one thing to the next. i landed on these few thoughts that i decided i better get up and write out. its nothing much... really, i'm here to see if getting things out of my brain might help the insomnia. i'm a literary person and so i always tend to view my life as a novel... with characters, villians and heroes and plot twists, etc. only, i don't really see many people as villians in real life, so no worries there. its more like there are people who shift the story into one direction or another, for better or worse. and i'm always waiting for the plot twist... hoping that one of the characters has something up their sleeve... like they're waiting to come in and save the day. unfortunately, this is rarely the case. i dislike sounding negative, but disappointment often prevails always bridled by hope... always there's hope. some might call it foolish... i like to call it faith. in reading CS Lewis, i have learned that one of the biggest tools of the enemy is not to turn people to Satan, but instead to turn people into doubters of everything... good or evil. making people believe that there IS nothing to hope for... that is the worst kind of living. hmmm... yeah, i'd rather be called a fool.